Mussolini comes to Washington

Propaganda • Politics • Public Works • the Bully Pulpit

Four Trump plays from the Mussolini handbook

At his mass rallies, President Trump likes to quip that maybe President for Life is a pretty good deal. From where I sit in Rome, it’s hard to tell on some days, who said it better? Trump or Mussolini? 

Although little Benito started out in abject poverty, the differences between the two end there. As a child, he was considered unruly, aggressive and moody.  

Mussolini grew up to become a media man who understood how much power properly placed propaganda held to prop him up. As he carried out his mission to establish a one-party state, fortunately, he would not achieve totalitarian rule because the monarchy and the papacy acted as a sort of check on his ambitions and power; not to mention the allies later running offense up and down the Italian peninsula, Africa and elsewhere to resoundingly put him and his fascist ways asunder.

But first, about that monarchy: The House of Savoy was beloved by the people – it's said that even the Margherita pizza was named after a Queen. Mussolini's Fascist party would eventually march on Rome forcing King Vittorio Emanuele III to dissolve parliament and make Mussolini not only Prime Minister, but Minister of the Interior and Foreign Affairs to boot. Mussolini, a great proponent of public works, quickly set off to clear the way for a massive avenue - the Via dei Fori Imperiali - so he might hold tributes in front of the huge white monument erected for Italy's kings. 
But by the time the war ended, the Savoia’s would be run out of the country into exile in Egypt; their palaces and properties confiscated, and no male heirs or royal consorts permitted ever to return. This held up until 2003, when Parliament figured that by then, they were quite toothless, only to discover that the former Prince had used his idle time to start up a prostitution ring in the northern gambling town of Campione d’Italia. His son recently set up a street food stand in LA. I guess they could use the dough.

But why did popular sentiment turn on them so quickly? Italians, after the war, realized that the monarchy had not defended its own people – pretty much its only real job description, other than that of opening bottles of champagne for visiting dignitaries. Mussolini had enacted the racial laws and before anyone knew it, Italian citizens, Jews, were being rounded up from the ghettos, eventually to be hauled off to death camps to the North, most never to return. This was too much for the peaceful people of Italy – even for those who had so blindly supported Mussolini and his muscling in on their basic liberties. 

At rallies—surrounded by supporters wearing black shirts—Mussolini caught the imagination of the crowds shouting, 'Viva l’italia!' Many Italians, especially among the middle class, welcomed his authority. They were tired of strikes and riots, responsive to the flamboyant trappings of fascism, and ready to submit to dictatorship, provided the national economy was stabilized and their country restored to its dignity. It would be declared:

“Either the government will be given to us, or we will seize it by marching on Rome.” 

[source: Brittanica]

So how did Mussolini rise to wield such power over a people and get away with it…that is, up until he was hanging by his feet from a lamppost in Milan, marking the end of WWII? At least in Italy. And especially for him? When elected Prime Minister in 1922, his Fascist party held only 32 of 535 seats. This guy, who many considered a blowhard, and far too young and unprepared for high office, swiftly obtained ‘emergency powers’, garnering control over parliament. In his defense, he remarked, “It is really easier to give orders myself instead of having to send for the Minister concerned and convince him about what I have done.” Just one year later, he would introduce a law to gain absolute majority in parliament. By the next election, the Fascists would secure 66% of the vote.

“I have absolute right to do what I want to do with the Justice Department."

To gain support of the people, Mussolini operated a binary system: employing intimidation or threats to suppress his opponents, while at the same time pretending to be a moderate when it came to crafting deals. He would be the lone warrior against that ultimate evil, socialism: “Italy… wants peace, wants quiet, wants work, wants calm; we will give it with love, if that be possible. Or with strength if that be necessary.” But who said it best?

“It should be a bill of love,” Mr Trump said, but “it also has to be a bill where we’re able to secure our border. Drugs are pouring into our country at a record pace. A lot of people coming in that we can’t have.”

That split message, part conciliatory and part unyielding…

[Independent • Jan 9, 2018]

Mussolini set out to ban opposition parties and non-fascist unions; not unlike corporate America’s decades-long battle against labor and teacher unions – perhaps starting with Ronald Reagan’s mass firing of the air traffic controllers in 1981, and ending with Walmart’s utter disregard for workers, up to Wisconsin’s banning of teacher unions altogether. Mussolini picked off opposition Senators one by one with those finding themselves like a few Dems who today are on the wrong side of the NRA, or publicly humiliated after a particularly cogent grilling of one’s Attorney General.

Pocahantas…Flakey…Flunkey…”Except for one senator, who came into a room at 3 o'clock in the morning and went like that [gesturing thumbs down, ndr] we would have had health care too, think of that.”

But one of the most effective tactics was Mussolini’s private security detail; basically arresting people for any anti-party activity. In the USA, peaceful demonstrators get arrested, others intimidated or frozen out for their ‘anti-patriotic’ stance while drivers are encouraged to plow through demonstrations. And ICE – well, we know which party those families would belong to, if they could vote. Mussolini reintroduced the death penalty in 1926, with scores of ‘traitors’ in line for execution, declaring, “…It will be less and less easy to threaten the government’s existence and tranquillity of the Italian people.” I imagine hordes chanting at his rallies, “Lock them up!” Eventually, 12000 prisoners would be held captive on a remote island, picked up by the private military police and Mussolini’s personal ‘bodyguards’.

“We are going to take a strong look at our country’s libel laws, so that when somebody says something that is false and defamatory about someone, that person will have meaningful recourse in our courts,” adding,

“Our current libel laws are a sham and a disgrace and do not represent American values or American fairness.”

President-elect Donald Trump doesn’t seem to tire of setting new precedents. Despite being provided with a newly bolstered Secret Service detail
after the election, the president-elect has retained his own private security and intelligence force, breaking with tradition and creating operational and potentially legal problems.

[source: Prospect.org]

Mussolini knew that another pillar to take down would be opposition newspapers, so he started censoring them, harassing editors or forcing them into exile. He ultimately proclaimed that one could only report within the confines of the State – his State – and no one would be permitted to muddy its name or actions. While obstructing the opposition press, he used his own newspaper, Il Popolo d’Italia (People of Italy) to spread his State propaganda. Even military defeats would be portrayed as a win.

President Trump kicked CNN reporter Jim Acosta out of the Oval Office after the reporter badgered him with questions. “Out!” 

While speaking about or tweeting about “fake news!” 153 times 

in his first 11 months in office. 

Enter Matteotti – who denounced this despot as early as 1924 -– “You want to hurl the country backwards, towards absolutism… We will defend by demanding that light be shed on elections” he challenged, culminating his impassioned speech with, “Now you can prepare my funeral oration.” Matteotti would be assassinated in short order, allegedly by Mussolini’s own private security force. In protest, 150 opposition members left the Chamber during one of Mussolini’s speeches. He quickly proclaimed that anyone leaving would not be allowed back into the House.

“The true believers who pulverize the search for truth are a fixture of American life. Their attachment to their heroes is absolute and impregnable. They have built themselves a big, beautiful wall. They have laid the cornerstones of absolutism.  [source: The American Prospect]

On the Democratic Black Caucus:
“They were like death, un-American. Somebody said treasonous. Yeah, I guess, why not?

Can we call that treason? Why not? 

I mean, they certainly didn’t seem to love our country very much.” 

To further consolidate his power, he turned a blind eye to tax evasion by big business and introduced religious education in public schools. He brought the men of the cloth to his side by increasing pay for the clergy and banning contraception, while at the same time, locking his own former mistress and her child in a lunatic asylum, lest they speak out.

Trump signs new budget deal giving taxpayer money to churches 
in direct violation of the U.S. Constitution.

It seems a swathe of people were still more inclined to protect the unborn than their own freedoms. Mussolini chirped from his balcony in Rome’s Piazza Venezia for every decree: “The truth is, the people are tired of liberty.” Once he determined he could govern by decree, he would hand down a dizzying 100,000 of them. 

Trump issued more Executive Orders in his first 100 days in office than any president since Harry Truman.

By 1928, just 6 years after taking power, all new newspapers would be banned. Thankfully, in a digital age this is impossible, but terming any opposition article, “fake news” or insisting that journalists are the “Enemy of the People” while muddying the waters with real fake news, comes as close as you can to mirroring the nefarious deeds of the past in the new millennium. Soon, Italians would be ‘educated’ with pro-fascist viewpoints alone – resistance outlawed entirely.

More than 200 protesters arrested on Inauguration Day will face felony rioting charges

In just under a year, by restricting the freedom of the press, the Fascists were fully in control of the people of Italy. The result? Mussolini became ever more popular, convincing the populace that extensive public works projects put people to work while educating the masses in civic virtue. It was not long for people to see that a strong single governing body would create an even stronger, united Italy.

"I hope they arrest these people because they're really violating all of us," Trump said.

His fervor to ‘go it alone’ (up until joining Hitler) was legend. But who said it better? “We become strongest, I feel, when we have no friends upon whom to lean, or to look for moral guidance”.

“'America First' - we won’t be lectured by corrupt countries on the Palestinian and Israeli issue."
"I am a Nationalist."

This ushered in the attack on the Deep State or the Cucks, or both – purging them until a fervent 300,000 followers would swear personal alliance to Mussolini, alone. He needed to make sure that the most radical ones who wanted a revolution – say, the Bannon’s of the group – were not allowed near the halls of power. A former (socialist) colleague of his would provide the perfect metaphor for Mussolini: “He is a rabbit, a phenomenal rabbit. He roars – observes those who do not know him – and mistake him for a lion.” Of course – Mussolini was once a socialist. But it would not take long to hear him call out Socialism as “A fraud, a comedy, a phantom, a blackmail.“ 

“Based on the fact that the very unfair and unpopular Individual Mandate has been terminated as part of our Tax Cut Bill”

In the end, it was this trumped up fear of socialism that allowed Mussolini to cling to power. And even as he gained control over most parts of government, he continued his shenanigans, playing with propaganda, day in and day out, in order to garner more recognition and tributes. His mantra, “The people must accept obedience. They must and they will believe what I tell them…” would soon securely establish his influence over a people. It was, effectively, a one-party state.

“Sean Spicer, our press secretary, gave alternative facts.”

More propaganda tools were set into motion, including the publication, ostentatiously called, The Cult of Il Duce. Mussolini would be the first to appear in a talkie movie. Posters would be printed, and State control over businesses following the crash of 1929 were deemed ‘necessary’ to help prop up the banks. The Corporate takeover of Italy was well-established at this point. Mussolini himself, the ex-socialist, put it this way: “Fascism should more appropriately be called Corporatism because it is a merger of state and corporate power.” Just ask Tillerson. Or the Koch Bros. Or the Waltons, or virtually every cabinet member tied to a major corporation.

“You work for me, you don’t criticize me,” the president was reported to have told one major federal contractor. 

Public works projects guaranteed full employment, with Mussolini summoning the ghost of Caesar to make his case. “A nation of spaghetti eaters cannot restore Roman civilization.” In other words, Make Rome Great Again. All told, it was the propaganda machine that gave him a comfortable, uncontested seat at the top. Britain’s Times observed, “Italy has never been seen so united as she is today. Fascism…abolished the game of parliamentary chess… it has given… national respect.”

According to Encyclopedia Brittanica, "Mussolini might have remained a hero until his death, had not his callous xenophobia and arrogance, his misapprehension of Italy's fundamental necessities, and his dreams of empire led him to seek foreign conquests.".

But what about that monarchy or the church as a check on his power? Although the Pope publicly upbraided Mussolini for his anti-semitism and his cozying up to Hitler in 1938, it was not soon enough nor emphatic enough; merely a slight tear in his iron-clad glove. It would seem that the Church still preferred a dictator over a socialist. And the die was cast.

As for the King, Mussolini would simply ignore advice doled out in their weekly meetings, limiting his interaction with the monarch. The King, in an effort to reestablish his position, welcomed the Führer to Rome instead of letting him meet with Mussolini. While still in control of the military, the King made his bed. He would eventually have to sleep in it – in exile.

Mussolini, in a rare moment of frankness, would concede he had had to share power, stating, “There were three of us: me, the King and the Pope.”

Alas, the United States cannot count on either of the latter two.

@irreverentitaly

Blogger & Author, Francesca Maggi

Has been commenting on Italy’s State of Affairs since 2007

Burnt by the Tuscan Sun • Irreverent Italy on Facebook

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America Votes...and the World Trembles | #TheTrumpEffect on Italy

I watched, stunned, from my balcony window as the streets started teeming with protesters, heading over to the American Consulate nearby. I was nervous my car - bearing  Michigan license plates - would be vandalized in a day that left “Fuck America” writ on the Consulate walls. In seemingly a matter of minutes, the compassion that the rest of the world had had for the United States was far less durable than those graffiti marks. Down went the American flags that had been displayed in store windows and homes across Europe. Gone were passers-by spontaneously hugging my dog donning his American flag bandana…Heck, gone was the bandana itself. Just eighteen months after September 11th, 2001 America, under its simpleton of a swaggering president, would stumble into Iraq and moor us in the deepest quagmire of our existence. Capturing hearts and minds of the Iraqis? If we had, they’d been traded in from those of the entire population of the rest of the world.

Elections have consequences.

This usurper, who narrowly lost the popular vote, had become President of these United States. A mediocre student and “businessman president” (who was never successful in business) asked daddy to help him live out his boyhood dream of being town sheriff. What could go wrong?

Americans abroad know all too well the effects of America’s own decisions. So much so, each time there’s an election, headlines ponder the results if the entire world could vote right along with us. The Economist did as much during the Obama election (he won by a landslide). When Obama finally reached office, Italian kids in Obama buttons, t-shirts, and dog lore shared their love with the first family. A trip to Italy by Michelle and the girls with photo opps of them wandering out of the Pantheon and later bringing home a doggie bag from a top restaurant added to the panache -- and crushed yet another barrier for Italians; if FLOTUS could take her food back to the hotel, heck so could all the rest of us. Doggie bag shaming would end up in the Italian trash heap of history. But most incredibly, little girls across the continent would quip that when they grew up, they wanted to be President of the United States. Kids of all ages were engaged fully in the U.S. political process.

After Bush & Co.’s policies had not only tanked the U.S. economy, but along with it, Europe’s and most of the world’s…we breathed a collective sigh of relief - so cathartic that Barack Hussein Obama received an undeserved Nobel Peace Prize - his take home trophy just for showing up onto the world stage.

But this brief moment in history would prove to be as ephemeral as gelato under a scorching sun. It would not be long before women were being rated by their looks, added to political gatherings for eye candy, and fish-lipped hotties with bulging breasts and ultra-thin resumes were cropping up in European parliaments and city councils across the country. With their 6-figure incomes, expense spending and jet setting, they shined in the media spotlight - an Italian Miss Universe Barbie goes to Brussels. Parents were thrusting their daughters into the poltical lair, and girls not quite 18 were in line for boob lifts and nose jobs by the hour. It was an epidemic.A media mogul, and the man who gave us desperate housewives stripping off their clothes on prime time became Prime Minister. There are plenty of posts comparing Silvio Berlusconi to Donald Trump but suffice to say, it appears that Silvio has bequeathed his personal How To List to The Donald directly. Berlus - errr — Trump even announced he would not take a stipend for his civil service. Silvio had done that. Kept his Milan Villa, check. Kept his beach hide-away. Check. Spoke highly of Putin. Check. Paid bribes (in the U.S. they’re legal) to make his troubles go away. Check. All Donald needs now is to adopt a little dog and we’d check that, too.
And just as beauty is more than Melania’s shiny complexion deep, the damage visited upon a generation of children being raised in this testosterone-laden brave new world, will be keeping historians busy for millenia to come.

While Donald and all his brashness and lousy sense of humour makes Silvio look like Gandhi (Beppe Severgnini says Churchill), this tag team built on media might and white blight are (almost) one in the same. Although divorced playboy Silvio did not even pretend to be on the religious side of things…he did take pains to line up a girlfriend to take out on public appearances, often dressed in white for the visual effect on voters.

Aside from the cosmetic similarities, hair-plugged Silvio hated being harassed by the media, comedians and random bloggers. He tried and succeeded on passing Gag Laws for bloggers and attempted a fire wall on journalists who might cross his path. He was embroiled in all kinds of lawsuits and claims (some his own) of ill repute. Berlusconi’s brother heads a newspaper that would smear anyone who opposed him, reaching right up to the very thin line of defamation but never crossing it (a right defended much more vigorously in Italy). Silvio flew in his own plane back and forth from Rome. Silvio never did make a blind trust (allowing his kids to run his businesses, as if, over a plate of pasta “How’s business?” might never come up in conversation.) But while calls for his daughter to run in his stead were made, even his kids had the good sense to stay out of politics.

In what may serve as a horrendous premonition (who says things in Italy occur well after America?) Silvio and his rubber-stamp parliament started passing laws that benefited his businesses or media interests, or more blatantly, kept him out of jail. In something that I am sure would not be below The Donald, he attempted at every turn to achieve immunity from all prosecution.

The demeaning of women rose to such a crescendo that the usually passive women of Italy came out in the millions to protest him - just for being Berlusconi. He would flippantly tell students, at the height of Italy’s brain drain, that to get ahead, they’d need to “marry one of my sons.” (only PYTs need apply). His bunga-bunga parties, underage harems, taped recordings, misogynistic comments and idiotic jokes…thankfully, finally garnered him his walking papers. He is far less a public figure - while Bush dumped his Texas ranch stage set, Silvio dumped his “fiancèe”. 
 
But Italians have never truly had the racial tensions that other European countries have. Italy has historically been quite a welcoming place, very Christian (and not in the American hypocritical sense of the word). They now complain they’re being overrun with immigrants (they are), but in a country with 46% youth unemployment, there are no jobs for immigrants to take away. So Silvio never quite turned up the anti-immigrant sentiment to full throttle Donald.
 
Berlusconi may have been a pit bull with his adversaries, or maybe not (he is rumored to have paid many of them off) - but he was not a bully. He was personable. He enjoyed a good joke (albeit usually on women). But by the time he was heading out the door, we were disheartened to discover that little girls were now saying they wanted to either “go into politics or become a showgirl.” In Italy, post-Silvio, they were one in the same.

People always inquire, when they find out I’m American, ‘Why do you stay here?’ But now, I think they know why. The country that to all and sundry seems like a giant movie set, with its bad guys firing automatic rifles, its music superstars, its 'can do' attitude that would make Ferris Bueller proud…has descended into Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Italians, who have kept the American Dream alive for well over a century, have finally been shaken awake. From the lore of the "Uncle in America” posting dollar bills to relatives in war time, to the success stories of Grom gelato and Luxottica eyewear…This most recent election has snuffed out the pipe dreams of each and every Italian, no matter where they are and how many generations they've been there.

Elections have consequences.

What will be the lasting legacy of a cast of white supremacists and bullies making policy for an entire nation? And what will be the ripple effect (or tsunami, rather) on those of us abroad? Finally, after these less-than-perfect Obama years and the regeneration of our economy, people were optimistic. Today, as I'm stopped in the streets by my African, Middle Eastern and Bangladeshi acquaintances, even Italy’s own immigrants feel the struggle ahead is palpable. And once again, I am overcome with shame.
The writing’s on the wall.


*Coming soon: what America can learn from running elections the Italian way

Fact Checking Michael Moore's Movie: Where to invade next? ITALY.

A friend living and working in Italy put it best to his Facebook followers: Michael Moore is, after all, a propagandist, not a journalist…He deals in hyperbole, which is why he’s a terrific social commentator and I am a fan. [Albeit by today’s standards in journalism, one could argue that the media's only currency is hyperbole]. And while his focus on Italy filled the collective with a shot of momentary pride, once the effect wore off, it was time to ask…Veritas?

As someone who has visited dozens upon dozens of companies, large and small, across the calf, heel, foot and toe of this boot, I feel the need to fully examine some of the holes that permeate Moore’s footholds. At first blanch, the piece felt a bit too canned, the people a bit too trite for ‘off-the-cuff’, and the supposed candid conversation so circumspect that it reminded me of a Barilla pasta spot, with Bella Figura just oozing out of every pore. Michael Moore is legend here. Knowing your footage might be seen by millions worldwide? Italians rarely show their pock marks and warts––you’d think with that kind of positive spin that Italians would be the happiest people on earth. So much for The Secret.



So, let’s get down to brass tacks:

We are a family — While I’m sure there are many family-owned businesses that treat their workers like a family (so much so that they even share the same bed with a few of the office hotties during those fabulous lunch breaks), the “I love it when they punch out and take 6 weeks vacation - it’s good for business” is a pile of porchetta droppings. I had but one other person in my tiny office and when she’d bolt to the door every day at 18.01 like Barney & Fred, even in the middle of a huge deadline, I would have a mini-meltdown. No matter, I was the only one at the office who would see it. How do you say Yabba dabba doo in Italian?

The man who stated that these incredible workers’ rights were fought for with blood, sweat and tears speaks the truth. In the 1970s, anarchists were cutting down company heads and just a few years back a leading economist was struck down for merely suggesting labour reform. The consequences of business’s antipathy toward workers has lead to Italy’s amazing automation of factories, from Torino to Detroit. My (Italian) boss would quip that America, with its millions of workers, was effectively pre-industrial, while Italy had brought robots in to do the job of dozens of people - post-industrial. Stop to take a look at garbage collection, with 1 guy in 1 truck pushing a button versus Americans pitching bags into the back of a truck and you'll see there is a lot of truth to that.

Photo credit: Daniele Leone / LaPresse

Factory upon factory, owners would proudly claim how technology had allowed them to replace 70 people with just a single robotic line - and with this technology, came a 50% jobless rates besides. All in the quest to avoid the cost of hiring employees who later can't be fired - even if they end up in prison.
 
Lunch Breaks - While it’s true that companies still break for lunch and provide veggie-laden cafeterias, go to Milano, where it’s far more commonplace to wolf down a sandwich with an espresso chaser. Street food has taken off here for a reason, and not just because it’s all people can afford now that unbridled tourism has heralded in $18 pasta plates. Notwithstanding, it still beats the herd of employees across the USA waddling to their cars to drive across the 5 lane highway to McDonalds & KFC drive-thrus on a daily basis.

Salaries — The young couple was correct. Their paltry salaries may allow them a modicum of quality of life, but let's face it: the average city councilman in a lovely hill town makes the same as Barack Obama, while the 600 strong bloated parliamentarians (in every way) take home two or three times as much, and that's before bribes, lifetime pensions (that carry to spouses and children too) lining offshore bank accounts well before retirement age. It's no wonder most youth aim to "enter politics" - it's the only money-making scheme in the country.
Just as in the USA, wages have been stagnant since 1992. Nonetheless, Italians manage to live better than your average American working three jobs. I believe it's due to their sharing of living quarters with mamma and papa’ up into their 30s. Salting away their pay, while someone else covers all your living expenses (even clothing and Thai resort vacations) and then coughing up the down payment on your house or buying it outright, definitely allows for handy disposable income with which to treat yourselves benissimo. 
As for the 13th paycheck? Yes, it’s true. Sometimes it’s even 14 (an extra one in August in order to enjoy your 4 week holidays all the more). But it’s a psychological tactic on the order of David Copperfield: Your annual labour-contracted salary is divided into 13 slices; allowing for gift giving and holiday meals all together as a family. I always liked the concept, but I still beg to differ when people quip how they get an “extra” month’s pay. No, you don’t. Pure and simple.

Labour laws providing for honeymoon time off is a wonderful family-friendly practice. You’d think that Italy would have transformed itself into a Mormon colony just to get those extra 2 weeks. [I mean, this is the place where the “legally blind” are regularly caught behind the wheel.] But pregnancy benefits have gone way too far. A new mother needs two months off before the baby is born? To what end? In Italy, it is oft-seen as bad luck to buy baby stuff prior to the birth, and baby showers are unheard of…All this time off means that young women are not welcomed with open arms into companies that is, unless it's into the open arms of the Company owner. 
The rub is, that while Italian women have given up on giving birth altogether (another sign of economic distress), they still don't get hired. Go figure.

Health Care - I haven’t seen enough of the movie to weigh in on whether or not Moore tackled Italy’s healthcare, but it was recently reported that it had one of the best in the world. Not sure about that (living in Italy, I'm healthier than the average American and don't have a general practitioner) but certainly, Italy’s physicians are top-notch and ply their trade worldwide, saving lives in both research and in the operating room. Not a day goes by that another Italian research team doesn’t come out with yet another amazing discovery. When an esteemed Italian doctor I know living in the USA needed a liver transplant for his son, he came to Italy. Imagine what they could do if they were actually funding R&D instead of lavish homes of politicians and government bureaucrats. Nonetheless, it makes it all the more risible when Berlusconi, waxing prolific on the wonderful health system we have, jettisoned straight to the USA the moment a cancer cell appeared on his sun-kissed skin (or maybe we just have better plastic surgeons in the USA? I mean, compare the stunning Sharon Stone to Donatella Versace...)

It is my experience that Italy does, indeed, take quite good care of its citizens, offering them regular checkups and so forth (it’s what the elderly do instead of playing bridge). On the downside, it is said people needing a mammogram may have to wait months, and beds are allotted to the highest bidder--an illegal practice which I hear goes on in the USA as well. But at least, people do not have to sell their house to undergo life saving treatment. Physical therapy - and even spa treatments - are considered part of recovery. In a country where a slight breeze or air conditioning unit can cause every sort of malady, people are allowed to stay home when they are sick, with no reprisals (other than the surprise doctor visits to make sure you're not in Capri instead). In the USA, you have to use up your ‘sick days’ and vacation time to bring a new life into the world. Sure, old people are lined up in hallways on stretchers, families need to bring in bottles of water, and waiting rooms are eerily reminiscent of an Iranian torture chamber, but I suppose you can say that on the whole, national health care in Italy is as humanitarian as can be.  Americans should only be so fortunate.

Live links in color above

Sidelined at Komen Race for the Cure

...or, why I won't be racing in this Main Event of the Year. 
The Italians have totally embraced the incredible importance of the Komen cause. Its branch is the oldest international organization in the league, and I believe pretty much the most successful. If nothing else, the Komen race did something absolutely Herculean (or Amazonian, rather) – It raised awareness of women and their breasts from both women and men alike [Plastic surgeon's office and reality TV aside].
All in all, we get a magnificent day out, with families, sponsors and lots of smiles - starting at the Circus Maximus and pretty much winding thru the main sights of Rome before ending with ice cream, games and loud music. It doesn't get much better than that.
Except for one thing.  A recent article - to cite support for the race and underline the importance of the dire situation and promise of a cure - suggests that breast cancer cases in Italy will go UP by about 50% in the next few years. Making it all the more important to run our butts off so sponsors will donate more money, right?

Wrong. I believe we should be Racing Against the Cause not racing for the cure.

Untold millions have been spent annually on funding research trying to come up with a cure. But until Komen puts their oodles of money into fighting Monsanto protection laws, removing the lead in our lipstick, cutting the flow of rivers of antibiotics poured into our poultry, combating the cancer-causing ingredients in most everything we put in and on our bodies, they can – and will - continue to raise untold amounts of money - which we'll always need more of as cases rise, and rise and rise.
So no. I won't partake in this un-Merry-go-Round of receiving hush money from sponsors and support from survivors while mad-with-greed multinationals carelessly (or is it carefully?) pour cancerous agents into our skin, onto our products, over the soil, high in the skies and down into the seas. 
[A major sponsor is Johnson&Johnson. That's right, the Company now found to have convinced millions to put talcum powder on our babies, in their diapers, in our panties and panty liners...and who is now facing an onslaught of lawsuits on behalf of the thousands of Ovarian Cancer victims. It's one thing to allow Philip Morris to support the Arts. It's quite another to have as your main sponsor a company causing the very thing you are up against.]
Komen needs to put an end to this rat race to the bottom and put their money into politicking and policies that will stop these nefarious profit-driven societal cancers right in their black-ribboned tracks.

As American as Baseball and Apple Pie

The Giants throw their weight around against the
Detroit Tigers in America's playoffs:  'The World Series'

Back home in Detroit, I had the privilege of seeing the entire city all geared up for Baseball's greatest faceoff:  The World Series.  After growing up with a whole lot of 'winning' teams from the Detroit area, I was thrilled after all this time to see our guys step up to the plate, in more ways than one.  But, one look at the lineup and I couldn't help but think how baseball is truly, the all-American sport.  First, it's the title:  World Series, being played out across these United States.  With few exceptions, even the players come from as far afield as Puerto Rico.  The arrogance.  There are excellent teams in Japan, of course, and I've met many a ball player in Parma; So what's preventing them from either a) making a true 'world series' or b) changing the name.

Next, were the "athletes" (term used as loosely as the outfits that need to fit around their ever-expanding waist lines).  It may be that baseball is losing its standing as far as competitive sports are concerned due to the fact that it's akin to watching sumo wrestlers in funny tights ply their trade.  Or then again, it's the ideal sport for the couch potato:  You, too, can eat bags of chips and down 6 packs of brew and make it to the big leagues!  It's the beer drinker form of American Idol - people practice eating and adjusting their balls in front of the mirror, then spit a few times while squinting into the sun--they may, just maybe, have what it takes.

Seeing these guys up to bat, it was an American dream come true: eat all you want, you don't need to even run to first, we'll just see if you can knock the ball out of the field.  Heck, if your knees feel like they can't hold up your girth, we'll do like we did in little league softball and give you a runner to make their way around the bases for you.  I don't recall body mass making it's way into the Moneyball calculations.  No wonder Boston hasn't made the grade.  They forgot to figure in that the team members were on the New York Policeman diet.  New York's finest couldn't catch a thief if they had to run after one, but they're not paid to do that anyway.  And just like their boys in blue, these guys couldn't catch a ball and make a play if they were paid -- oh. except they're paid millions to do just that.  Like much of America, it's a sport that still thinks it's great, even though it's lost it's footing and is drowning in the gluttony of its ways.  

Driver's Ed in Italy: Your Handbook to Recklessness

It seems that almost everyone I know has finally buckled down, or, perhaps I should say, capitulated to facing the last great bastion of bureaucracy, after the id cards have been issued, the health certificates passed with flying colors, the social security numbers registered with authorities.  The Driver's Ed Test.  The very idea of facing the ESAME = Exam shakes the souls of lesser men.  You can read more about one expat's typical experience here.
But, what is the cause for concern?  Most of my friends have been driving for thirty or forty years.  Basically, the USA refuses to recognize Italian driver's licenses (after all, these are the guys who gave us the Ferrari, the greatest vehicles with the most outstanding drivers on earth...) - I think it's an extreme case of sour grapes - so Italy won't recognize ours (rightfully so).  We are then left to go through 'the system' in order to put the pedal to the metal and legally hit the roads.  Too bad that both countries happily accept drivers from places like, oh, inner Sudan or the Maldives - which I don't even think have cars on the roads.
But, the more you hear about the trials and tribulations of achieving your driver license, the more incredulous you become every single day that you happen to be in traffic.  As cars veer into your lane, a guy sends text messages at 100 mph, no one signals, and babies are carried on front seat laps, it's as if everyone crams for the exam, only to forget every single thing they were so preoccupied with learning after about 34 minutes.  And, judging from what it is I truly remember in college, I think this theory may hold a whole lot of aqua.
You not only have to cram for the oral exam, but you also need to pass the driving test as well.  Rightly so, you need to be able to regurgitate the speed limits for any kind of road (something that I do not know), understand who gets the right of way at most every type of intersection, and of course, put on your seat belt the moment you get inside the vehicle or it's an automatic fail.  Judging from the traffic patterns, I think the test is easy:  speed limits are whatever you can do without hitting the car in front of you, intersections are for rushing into even if it's a red light, and seat belts are for sissies.  But friends tell me that you must also know all the parts of the motor, how to change a tire, and various mechanical things as well.
You know that women pass that test with flying colors since in every roadside emergency, they are the first to tap out the road service phone number to come a running.  Why all this acumen goes flying out the window once they actually get behind the wheel is one of those mysteries of life right up there with the immaculate conception.  It doesn't matter, compared to the USA, Italians really must know their cars inside and out.
But I got a big kick out of a friend's story of his experience getting his license in the USA.  The questions are written, there are like 10 of them, and, along with the driving test the entire operation takes under an hour.  He said he was licensed to drive in Italy:  a car, a truck, large vehicles, a tank, and his own private plane.  On top of that, he had the best experience that anyone could ask for: He was from Naples.  Arriving at the exam, and meeting the 90 year old instructor, he decided to be prudent.  He utterly failed his driving test.  I believe it was a first in the annals of driver's tests.
The reason?  He went too far under the speed limit.  Turns out he averaged about 25mph in a 35mph zone.  Next time, he thought, he better put his Neapolitan skills to the test, instead.
Just as long as he doesn't try to steer cruise ships, like his fellow paesano, Captain Stecchino.


For more on driving in Italy (from my Travel Tips Page on the blog), click these links:

Deciphering street signs in Italy
Driving at night in Italy 
Getting a driver's license in Italy

America...Land of the Free?

It's more like America…Land of the free refills and home of the brazed chicken burgers.

It’s not enough to land in the USA and be met with an army of people straight out of central casting for Wall-E.  America does its very best to tell you straight up that it is an unapologetic Land of Plenty.  Nor more the land of Milk & Honey, it is now the home of 400-calorie milk lattes and honey mustard on your two-patty chili burger. 

As if the weeble-wobbles in your midst weren’t advertising enough, nowadays landing in America is pretty much the closest thing to being one of the flock at KFC’s.  At every airport across the country, you’ll find spiffy food courts where Americans are led to graze 24/7 before being corralled onto planes where they’re plied with peanuts and beverages and yet a few more meals before landing.  Perhaps they're actually being prepped for faux-gras instead.

- Welcome to the USA -

At Detroit Metro airport, I was unable to find my way to the baggage claim, until after I worked my way thru the maze of food vendors.  Dozens of shops crowded out the gates just in case I didn’t have enough to eat on the plane ride over.  Arriving in DC, the unmistakable and impermeable odor of fried fill-in-the-blank greets you in both arrivals and check-in.  Making your way to your gate, you now can enjoy a host of scents from fried Chinese rice to fried burgers and - ah – fries.  They used to study scents to make you want to linger in the shopping malls.  In Supersized America, these have been swapped out for the natural scents of deep-fry peanut oil, char-broiled burgers and oriental-spiced dishes.

Just in case you already imbibed in your third meal of the day before lunch, deep-fried donuts and other less noxious items like ice cream and lattes await you.  By the time I reached my hotel, and in the 90 degree heat, my hair and clothing stunk to the point that I felt I had been dipped in batter and deep-fried myself.  I imagine it won’t be long until Americans are sporting eau de chicken nuggets perfume – just to turn your fast-food guy on.

It didn’t used to be this way (and I’m not talking about the intro of poly-unsaturated fats in almost everything we eat).  When I first tried convincing airports across the country to allow me to place manicure stations near the gates, I was told repeatedly that “The gateways and gate areas were for moving passengers - and only that.”  Little did I know that it would be less than a decade before that meant moving passengers into food courts and moving bellies so far out they block your view and crowd you out of the very gateways you were trying so in vein to reach in the first place.  Not to mention your seats once you board the plane.

Italian Post Office Blues

I have been sending out copies of my book recently to places far and wide.  And incredibly, books were delivered to the person intended in under four days - and these were to places as disparate as outside Milan, the Siena hillside, London, and Calabria.  So much so, I thought maybe I'd have to eventually eliminate the chapter in my book, The Postman Never Rings (even) Once.  
In fact, with all the talk these days of the U.S. Postal service eliminating saturday delivery, it looks like I might have to republish the chapter in a book on the USA.
While discussing the post office and all the terrific things one can do inside this update of the Ancient Forum main square, one newcomer to Italy remarked to a colleague that he'd never set foot inside an American post office in his life but after moving to Italy, he'd already been there five times in under 2 months!  
Another Italian friend was totally bummed out because he had to step inside the post office  to make some transactions.  He was worried about the wait.  I had never thought of it, but that's because it was the first of the month.  The elderly would be mobbing the joint to collect their pension checks.  So that's why I sometimes found that I was the youngest one at the post office!  Certainly - the young immigrants now use call centers or Western Union outposts to wire their money home...
And while it looks like these days money might buy efficiency (it's now €5.50 just to send my light book outside Italy), I'll stick by my comment under the book entry entitled, Going Postal:

For any expatriate or any Italian who has lived abroad                                          Post Office horror stories are legend:  true legends.

 Feel free to post yours!