Working in Italy - What NOT to do

People who accuse me of picking on Italy usually think I really dig for the dirt.  I usually respond with the fact that most of my information comes from Italian newspapers, conversations with taxi drivers, men-in-the-coffee-bars, that sort of thing.  But I nearly spat out my cappuccino today reading about a "new phenomenon" that has crossed the radar screens of HR personnel across the Boot.  That's because, not only have I experienced this since 1992, the situation will be one excerpt on my forthcoming book about doing business in Italy.  The article dealt with the delicate situation on how to handle mamma or papà accompanying their precious bambino on the job interview.

From an excellent blog post from Flown & Grown
in which I discover that in this brave new world of helicopter parents
that this is not necessarily a wholly Italian phenomenon

I used to warn my staff when hiring in Italy, when I ran a small subsidiary for an American multinational, was...to kindly decline the interview for anyone who's mother called for the appointment. I once got a mamma on the phone who took umbrage at my suggestion that...If La Mamma had to make their appointment, I didn't want that person as my employee. She did what any mother would do - she stuck up for her brilliant salesman son.  She upbraided me, telling me that her son "could not be expected to make the calls himself from his current employment, now could he?" (In his/her defense, it was the age before ubiquitous mobile phones).  I offered that he had a lunch break, didn't he?  
Mammas & Papàs would often be waiting in my waiting room, or in the hallway just outside the door.  I would have to commend the moral support vibe and sheer commitment, but it often left me bewildered more than bewitched by the candidate's drive. The article went one further, citing that some people in the hospitality industry, actually had the parent walk into the interview altogether.
Mamma out of the room, these same people then said that the next faux pas was to ask, almost immediately, how much the job paid.  Again, in my tiny little office world, this happened time and again.  You should see the look on their faces when I would respond, "Absolutely nothing.  Or at least, that's what I'll be paying you if you don't first tell me why I should hire you in the first place, and what you're going to do for me."
If cellphones had been handy at the time, I could just see these kids texting away as if in the university exams room, desperate to emote the correct reply.  Today, they probably ask for a 'Life Line' and make the call to the parent out in the car, anyway.
In the U.S., according to Flown & Grown, now we have Take your parent to work day! You can read about one mom's misgivings on the topic which I share wholeheartedly.  Of course, it's easy for me to come down so hard - I don't have kids.  But still...With Italians living longer than ever, and parents around til kids are in their 70s, I can't help but think why that youth unemployment is over 50%.


Check out my latest post on Irreverent Italy!
Life in a tourist destination...
http://irreverentitaly.blogspot.it/2014/01/italian-phonetic-language-after-all.html

In Italy, a child...by any other name...

Will still poop its pants. 
That Italy is a male-chauvinist society is fairly common knowledge. I often bring into the blog the latest in keeping women well-heeled & childless in their monster SUVs [after all, going barefoot even in summer is barbaric, and pregnant? No one can afford kids anymore].  But in the name game, as one commentator told the press, Italy isn't in the 20th century, they're in the 1800s.  Well, as of today, all that changed.  Thanks to a dynamic couple from Milan, who refused to take "No" for an answer when told that their child could not bear the mother's last name. [For purposes of this post, I'll ignore the obvious - that even women's last names eventually lead back to a patriarch somewhere].
An Italian friend who had four kids 40 years ago with the woman who would become his life partner, was told that because they were unmarried, he would have to list on the birth certificate, 'Padre Sconosciuto' - Father Unknown.  Fast forward to our Milanese couple in 2012, and they were told that their offspring, if the were to sport the mom's name, would have to be listed the same way.  Outraged, and with the rest of the world on their side, they took their case to the European Union - and won.
Not so long ago, Italians decided that women could, indeed, change their own names.  But the laws drew the line on the kids.  I always liked the fact that women kept their own last names in Italy - but I've seen plenty of times, when the father is not part of their lives, how strange it is for the kids and their mom to have different identities altogether.  Gladly, that's not the norm.
So, Italy, one hyphen at a time, is allowing for names to be joined, for women to take their partner's last names, for children to take hers.  The last bastion is, in naming them strangely like Wednesday Addams, or Apple and such.  In one instant, and I believe it was a person who wanted to call their kid Adolf Hitler, or something like that, the judges intervened and refused to allow the name to go through. 
Moreover, middle names still cause problems.  I was actually not admitted to hospital once because I had filled out all the forms in the spaces provided: LAST NAME / FIRST NAME. Not thinking of my (largely unused) middle name.  When they took one look at my i.d. card, they said I'd have to start all over from scratch, months away, in order to get admitted properly.  I took the papers out of their hands and swiftly added my middle name to them...offering politely, that I had no idea what they were on about.
What would the Italians have done if they had gone the route of the Spaniards, and offered up a half dozen last names for every child birth?  Most of whom hail from the matriarchal side of the family?  I shudder to think of the bureaucracy that would ensue.

A few more fun posts on the Name Games of Italy:
Italian Name Origins
How (not) to correct your dual last names 
Fun Italian names

Branding la Befana

Today, I am not having an Epiphany - busy celebrating in Rome with an all-you-can eat brunch with my coven of friendly friends...I therefore reprise my annual Epiphany post!
Today is the celebration of the Epiphany. Or rather, it’s the day the old kitchen witch brings gifts for good kids or fills stockings with coal for the naughty ones. And traditionally, this has been the Big Day for little kids, up until not very long ago when Good St. Nick finally overtook her market share. After all, who could make it against a rosy-cheeked guy with reindeer and elves? Even though I thought La Befana might make a comeback post-Harry Potter, with her broomstick and all.

But, I think La Befana’s image issue is actually representative of a deep-seated marketing problem which besets all of Italy.  Sure, everyone associates Italy with beautiful things, fast cars, and Pavarotti’s voice, but luxury goods aside, the Italians still haven’t quite caught the hang of brand imaging for everything else. Think about it: Jolly ol' St. Nick? Although originally hailing from Myrna (by some sources), he became Italian and gained sainthood there after all.  And yet, the guy’s gift-giving habit will forever more be associated with Laplanders and the North Pole. All because of shrewd branding by the guys who gave us Nokia [although it was Antonio Meucci or even Innocenzo Manzetti who actually invented the telephone].  Heck, even Google owes its engine to an Italian inventor.

Take our long-nosed Befana, for example:

A scary old gift-bearing witch is the figure they chose to symbolize the arrival of the Three Wise Men…and to announce that God had come forth in the body of Jesus? My friend’s son here for a visit couldn’t sleep all night – not from anticipation, but from abject fear. Those wily Olde Englishmen - the forefathers of our mass-advertising execs -- already defying the Church with their divorce decrees, caught on to this story, and rebranded her for Halloween. And now trick or treating has taken Europe by a storm.

[And dare I mention what happened to her when she reached America? Having already turned Halloween into practically a 2-month event including movies, Harry Potter book launches, yard decorations fit for MGM, haunted houses and so many costumes there actually exists a Dept of Halloween in China, it then took the witch, put her in the kitchen so she could stay (and they could sell her) year round.]

And those poor Sicilians steeped in tradition? They didn’t even get the scary witch and her treats to look forward to. Those kids only get 'I Morti', that night between Nov 1st and 2nd when they would be visited by dead relatives in the night. In the morning (if they hadn’t died of fright from boogeymen), they’d find scattered about the balconies or windowsills chestnuts, almonds, nuts, and dried up figs. It’s no wonder the practice never quite took off in the rest of the world despite centuries of migration to and occupation from dozens of other countries.
Branding, my dear Watsonini. Branding.

**For more on our beloved Befana...Click Here

Italy: The Best of 2013

Habitual readers of my blog will know that for years, I have posted a Tante Belle Cose monthly roundup of some of the terrific things that happened in and around Italy.  My readers are so cynical, that people barely glanced at the listings. And while there are millions of articles, blog posts, videos, files postings on all that is great with Italy, those who know me, see that I take a rather - errrr - 'different' approach. 
But, in the spirit of the festive season, and in the hopes that you, dear readers will actually for once read 'til the end, here is my year-end review of some terrific or zany things that happened in 2013 Bell'Italia:

• Jan/The Gemelli Hospital - A young boy's heart valve operation was entrusted to the head of the cardiac unit at this Vatican-run hospital; famous for working on Popes but even more famous for the miracles performed on children. I panicked when the Chief Cardiologist was under 40.  I mean, this is a country in which many kids are still (supposedly) hitting the books in their 30s. Instead, he is one of many of the renowned medical professionals operating in this country.  And while many more skilled and highly trained researchers, scientists, physicians have left for greener pastures, he (and his wife) remain the face of what Italy could be if the younger generation was given half the chance.

  

  from the UK's Telegraph

• Feb/Pope Francis - Anyone who reads my blog or my twitter feed knows I am no fan of religious institutions of any cloth. The abject hold over the hypocrite politicians by the Vatican State - a theocratic society where women are not allowed in any real power - is outrageous. But I love this Pope.  Since his election, taking real action against the corruption in his own house, the plague of pedophiles in his midst and with discourses that could be translated easily to much of Italian society, well, I hope someone is listening.  Heck-he even told his own clergy that their homilies were boring.  Add to that an American woman at the helm of his finance committee, and his selfie, let's hope we can all surf this tsunami of change.

• Mar/Berlusconi Convicted - Finally, justice was served, albeit lukewarm (he's still not served a day) after the courts have been trying to try him for years. He was found guilty of wiretapping a political rival. Incredibly, in Italy, the statute of limitations does not stop once court proceedings have been initiated. So Silvio's crack legal team just practices delaying tactics until the clock runs out.  For a pretty thorough FAQs of Silvio's trials, just click here. And, don't forget to drop in on my dedicated Silvio Show Page above!  As most commenters would remark, in any other country he'd have been long gone from politics.

• Apr/New Government Elected - While not much would change with a left-leaning government, at least we no longer had to live down the peccadilloes of our previous Prime Minister. It was liberating. Even more liberating was the party of defiance, under the helm of comedian & general disruptive force, Beppe Grillo, came to the fore in huge numbers. The media (wholly controlled by politicians) continues to dismiss him and his members, but let's face it.  In a country of self-professed sheep - I call them lemmings - it's heartening to see at least one person call out the politicians for the ongoing rape of their country.

• May/Life & Death in Pompeii - While the actual walls of places in Pompeii have been crumbling before our eyes, while Vesuvius still boils under the previously scorched earth, and while city officials decide - despite all indications to the contrary - that it's okay for people to dwell on its slopes, the world got treated to another mega-exhibition on this fabled place; the way exhibitions were intended - by the British Museum.  The show brought much of the story and traditions to life through the unique objects, including a magnificent table, never seen in public.  You can still pick through the timelines, the stories, the cult of Bacchus, you name it on their slick website.  Carpe Diem!  Here's the Eruption Timeline

• June/The Supermoon - It's hard to pick the most amazing shots of the Supermoon with Italy as it's front drop.  Just 'Google It' and stargaze for yourself.  

• July/Italy's first astronaut in space - My head still in the stars, with the arrival of the 203rd astronaut into outer space continues to astound us with his shots of the world at large (very large) and his twitter feed (@astro_luca) Thankfully, we did not lose him in late July when his helmet filled with water during his spacewalk.  More here.

An Italian astronaut in space always makes me giggle. That's due to the old yarn about the Pan-World Space Mission looking for the next astronaut to send to Mars.  They interview the best candidates from every viable nation.  In the final round, the American says he'll do it for $1M -leaving behind his wife & family for 3 yrs.  The Russian cosmonaut says he'll do it for $2M. The Italian waltzes into the interview, and declares that he'll do it for $3M.
The interviewer is astounded.  "What do you mean, these other countries have the finest programs on earth!" he exclaims.  The Italian leans over and says, "Don't you understand? A million for-a you, a million for me -- and dee American goes to Mars!"

• Aug/New places in Italy - I got to spend my August with my sister/niece & nephews on Italy's Adriatic coast.  And, the best part yet, was seeing places I've never been to before!  Of course, no trip is complete without paying a visit to my favorite town in all of Italy, Ascoli Piceno (not least for their olive ascolane, deep-fried stuffed olives washed down with cool white wine).  But I was pleasantly surprised by the towns above Pescara, the churches that were out of this world, and the markets actually included real Italian-made products.  Walks near the Gran Sasso made it all the more spectacular, and provided a welcome breath of fresh air from the August heat.

• Sept/Raising the Concordia - While none of us can get over the 'Hands in the cookie jar' defense of the indefensible Captain Coward of the Concordia, I was glued to its raising.  It was a feat of engineering, and while it was a multinational endeavor, the Italians had much to be proud of.  Certainly, spending all that money on this derelict ship just to send it for demolition left some wondering where our priorities were.  After all, hospitals are being closed all around us, schools are crumbling, and all this money is washed away at sea [granted, the operation did save the fragile environment underneath the ship.]  But compared to the outrageous purchase of dozens of fighter planes for a country that can't afford toilet paper for its students, well...it's hard to understand.  Nonetheless, I was glued to the screen, if for no other reason than accident porn.  

This is gonna be a tough one to set straight
From the inimitable genius of Gianni Falcone www.gianfalco.it 

More takes on the year of the Concordia conundrum:

Captain Coward 

Concordia's Deep Throat 

• Oct/Night at the Museum - Each October, we're treated to free admission & festivities throughout the country.  But in reality, these aren't the only times you can get into the most beautiful places on earth for a song.  There is a week each May as well, free nites on your birthday, and  bank collections and FAI heritage trust sites often open for free.  And all winter, there are free visits to the show in Rome of Augustus.

• Nov/ASRoma Football/Soccer - Fans saw the Rome team came back from years of mediocrity (despite their 37 yr old Captain's finesse on the field) to have a fleeting chance at no. 01.  The games have all been exciting, and there's more to come in January!  With an updated website - in English, no less - I follow a lot of the English football commentary for my play by plays, even on twitter.  It's great to see.  In November, we also saw the relaunch of Naples' Città della Scienza after being burnt to the ground by someone - most likely interested in developing the area, and not kids' brains.  [Full disclosure: We opened with one of the shows I represent from the USA, Brain: The World inside your head].

• Dec/Londinium - After leaving behind: the fab book event in which I introduced readers to many expat authors living in Italy (I'll be adding even more to the titles on my Book Page Tab above), the drab Christmas tree mounted in Rome's Piazza Venezia (and crucified on twitter), the mad grab of politicians for more money & perks as they force most of Italy into poverty and cripple companies, I saw that sometimes, things are the same all over.  Attending the terrific show of Fascinating Aida, we found that Brits are threatened by immigration, school teachers can't make a living wage, the bathrooms at London's Science Center, airports & other public places don't flush (but they do have toilet paper!), and the price of transportation is keeping people away - from everything and everyone else.  As they say in Italy, "Tutto il mondo è un paese - The whole world is just a village".

Buone Feste! To the habitual Readers of my blog, to all my peeps, and to my occasional voyeurs and (sadly, even fewer) occasional commenters!  See you in 2014.

Many live links throughout the post.

A Guide to Life in Italy - Now Available!

What to get the Italophile in your life? 

A User's Manual to Life in Italy!

Francesca Maggi takes off her rose-colored glasses and takes on Italy's world-renowned Quality of Life.  Starting with her X Commandments of Life in Italy [Thou shalt not covet thy customer, Thou shall hold La Mamma as your one true omnipresent and omniscient lord of the household], she tackles Italian bureaucracy, drivers, superstitions, traditions, La Mamma and more.  Readers will get a hilarious insider's guide from an outsider's perspective, taking us through the trials and tribulations of life in Bell'Italia.

About the author...Francesca Maggi first came to Italy at the tender age of 4 months.  A return visit at age 6 sealed her fate as she endured the agony and enjoyed the ecstasy of this country of contradictions.  She has been working with Italy for nearly 30 years, 20 of them as a resident while traveling the entire swathe of the Boot and taking in the sights, sounds & society's peccadillos from Trapani to Trieste, from Trento to Taranto.

Illustrations by...Each chapter is introduced by the inimitable witty vignettes of Gianni Falcone, or GianFalco...www.gianfalco.it which are part & parcel of the humor of the book...(including the cover image).  You can see more by Gianni by clicking the main tab on the blog page, Cartoon of the Week...or visiting his blogs on OpenSalon (Just a few Pixels) or Diario Acido.

What they're saying...Francesca Maggi is brilliant -- a modern day critic following in the footsteps of Luigi Barzini's The Italians.  Her stories are at once funny, irreverent and poignant.

OMG - i just read the first few paragraphs of the ''Baby on Board' part of your book! that was hilarious.....       i'm still laughing  ROFL!

Been reading your book and LOVE it!! Great insight and funny, FAMILIAR anecdotes!

Get a signed copy if you purchase the book off the Official Home Page 
Burnt by the Tuscan Sun

http://burntbythetuscansun.blogspot.com

Italian Politics: The Party's Over

As we get ready to ring in a New Year, I can't help but think how much I have to be grateful for as the year in Italy, at least, has been winding to an end (though it feels a bit more like it's been sliding into home base after a hit with bases loaded).  The last few weeks have been rough and tumble at best, but there's been great - no, grandissima - cause for celebration.

Berlusconi getting ready to (try) & get some tail --
now, don't forget the little blue pills!
from www.wonderfulworldofanimation.com

First, the Senate voted to remove Silvio Berlusconi from their cozy citadel of comfy perks including the most significant one, immunity from prosecution. I've been relishing his  blustering ever since which, at first reminded me of the Wizard of Oz at the moment Toto pulled away the curtain. Nowadays, he's starting to remind me of Elmer Fudd (fittingly, in this episode, he shouts, "The long arm of the law is weaching out & closing in on you!"  So much so, I wish media outlets would put the gag order in effect.  If they'd just stop reporting his bullshit, maybe, he'd finally go away.  Pay no attention to that man hiding behind the mask of makeup &amp hair plugs!

Next, Prime Minister Letta announced that govt financing of (the hundreds) of political parties would finally be put to an end.  It is one of the largest and most efficient 'industries' in Italy -- that of plainly milking funds.  Hang your shingle out under the guise of 'political party' and you're open for business.  Whoever said that government didn't work?  I rejoice in silence while waiting to see the fifteen hundred new avenues the parties will come up with to get their money back [My guess?  Submitting sandwich & espresso receipts in the millions].  I mean, these are the same people who were discovered printing zillions of bus tickets and selling them (Not that I would know...you can't find a bus ticket within a 1 mile radius of my house).
For the record, the last time these parties got their financing pulled (for urgent expenditures going toward villas - parties - vacations - you name it), by virtue of a wild public referendum, the politicians simply renamed the expense ledger.  For years, this act of sheer chutzpah has been festering like a boil -- and was one of the main reasons by my guess that put Mr. Grillo into power.  It is a symbol of all govt waste, like Imelda Marcos and her infamous shoe collection.  Mr. Letta & Co., realize they have got to cut it loose.  Let's see if it really happens this time.

But then, the best news of all.  Youthful Matteo Renzi, the dynamic Mayor of Florence, was finally elected by a virtual landslide to head up the Democratic Party (of the left).  In many circles (on the left) he is vilified.  I don't know why, exactly, perhaps seen as yet another political hack, or not red enough.  And I don't care.  He is half the mean age of these joker power brokers and, he hand-picked 7 women on his 'cabinet' out of 12 spots.  Talk about a sea change.  This staff has an average age of 35.  At that age, they still haven't been in politics long enough to figure out how to stash away fistfuls of bribes in suitcases. Yet.  I was hopeful about the woman at the helm of the Latium Region - But then she was caught handing out high-paid positions as if she were the head of Goldman Sachs on coke.  If this dream team can figure out how to win: Without pocketing the 45 Million euro in their coffers for party financing (gifted by the hard-working proletariat) / Keep it all clean / And actually do something to improve this country, it will be a New Year after all.  

*some live links above

Chk out my new post on Irreverent Italy!

As I make this year-end transition to cover current events in Italy that most amuse or shock me, I invite you to check out my latest post on my blog-in-progress, Irreverent Italy.

Where I imagine the Amazon Drone Delivery in Italy:

Amazon Drone Delivery would put
this guy outta business and into
a bricks & mortar enterprise

http://irreverentitaly.blogspot.it/2013/12/amazons-drone-delivery-arrives-in-italy.html