Five things Italian Women can do to Demand Dignity

The movement of women at the If not now, then When? rallies by tens of thousands was quite a sight to see.  So, in an effort to contribute my 2cents' worth, I'd like to provide a quick reference guide to demanding dignity (or, guerrilla handbook) for those who don't know what the next steps should be:

1.  Boycott companies that run negative advertising.  With a special shout out to Sisley & Diesel. Point out to your daughters that yes, they’re attracted to those fashions like a moth to a flame, but…Do they really truly want to be seen as being in submissive positions to the guys in their lives?  It’s not fashion.  It’s subjugation.  In America, many families refuse to buy Barbies, in Italy, just do the same.  Burkahs are not the problem; being depicted bare-waisted and laid out while a guy bites your ass or ties you up - is.

I still refuse to eat Grana Padano cheese, after their 1990s ads depicted a 9-month pregnant woman, rubbing her tummy in front of the fire, which on close-up revealed the hot-branding of the cheese right on it.  I still get nauseous every time I think of it.

2.  Write letters & emails.  Every time. Again & again, until they ‘get it’.  Journalists in Italy need to stop writing headlines like, “Killed out of Love” when a control freak psychopath kills his lover, wife or ex.  This isn’t love, believe me.  When the judiciary claims that rape was consensual because she wore jeans, take to the streets, like only a handful of women did at the time. When newscasters put tits&ass front&center, turn the channel – and then tell them why.  Write their advertisers.  One day soon, as ratings drop, they’ll finally get the message.

I recently came across an atrocious ‘free magazine’ in my area, Domenica, supposedly for women.  With their select pin-up girl on the cover.  Her lips were so deformed, I was glad they said she had her “piedi per terra” because if her feet weren’t firmly on the ground, those oversized lips would have carried her straight up & away.  The all-male staff needs to understand that these un-‘natural beauties’ do not represent us.  Period.  And, seeing these grotesque versions of beauty on the cover, does not entice us to look inside, either.

3.  Speak out on all fronts at your Company.  If you go into a man’s office, and he has a nude or semi-nude calendar up there, point it out – embarrass him - Even if he’s your boss – and then take it to HR. If women are getting bypassed, not going to meetings, not getting trained...put them on notice.  It might be wise to point out that, Companies with 3 or more women on the Board, outperform the competition 9 to 1. Yes, Nine to One.  To this, I would add that, if women in Europe make up 60% of College Grads, if women graduate with higher honors, and if companies with all male management say that ‘they hire only the best’, someone is lying.

The Madonna on the Rocks

At Abruzzo's Grotta del Cavallone, where both men & women work as guides, these posters were at the lift bringing tourists up and down the mountain.  Sorry. I do not want my 6 yr. old nephew to learn that this is normal. It's not. And, no, they do not 'exalt' the 'bellezze delle donne'. It's Pornografia pure & simple. Look it up in the dictionary.

4.  Stop attending seminars, workshops & conferences that have an all-male lineup.  It’s insulting and disgraceful to see a bunch of stuffed shirts at the table, eye-balling the babes who bring them their coffee.  If your Company is hosting an event, make sure the organizer briefs the speakers that ‘locker room humor’ is not funny.  They can swap stories behind the scenes.  There will be women executives in the audience, and we’re not interested in hearing demeaning comments about your wife or lover. Grazie.

Every year I’m invited to La Società del Marketing presentation. And every year, they bring in the top guys in marketing.  And every year, I remind them that the greatest marketeers in history probably have a combined income greater than 167 countries on the planet earth:  J.K. Rowling (Harry Potter), Oprah Winfrey & Martha Stewart.  Add to this, Esteè Lauder & Anita Roddick, and heck, even the Fendi sisters, and you start to wonder what any men are doing up at that table.  I won’t attend until I do see some breasts up there, and hopefully, not those shown by the Pirelli calendar guy like last time.  You can read my blog entry on the whole episode here. 


5.  Refuse to pay the bolletta RAI – insipid TV Tax.  If women make up 51% of the population, if they outlive the men by 9 years, if they’re responsible for household purchase decisions, if many are in the home watching the tube, then, why aren’t we voting with our wallets?  Hit them where it counts.
If enough of us resist, perhaps we can even topple the out of touch octogenarians at the helm of the RAI.  As for me? I don’t even own a TV anymore.

And…a final word for the men out there, and I paraphrase Sociologist Michael Kimmel from the Women’s Int’l Networking Conference: 
Women who work outside the home are happier, they’re better role models for their kids, they (ideally) have husbands who share responsibilities (notice that I didn’t say ‘help out’), and…lo and behold!  When they feel confident, and not frustrated nor depressed (even though working in a ‘man’s world’ might make you so) they will see their partner in a better light and want to share in those good feelings.  If you’re satisfied at work, you’ll be able to satisfy in the bedroom, and if you have a supportive husband at home, you’ll have more time for sex.  So guys, in the end, if you let women work, give them gratifying careers, help them out at home, you’ll get more sex.  The choice is yours.  
But if not now, then when?