Tuesday, June 1

Italy's New Austerity Program - A dedication

Everyone would probably be in agreement that the Abruzzo region, hit last year by the devastating earthquake which uprooted hundreds of thousands, would be living as they say, 'hand to mouth' right about now.  At least that's true for the hapless residents, the Abruzzi diaspora currently living in temporary quarters (while asking, 15 months on, just how temporary is temporarily?).  With reconstruction money flowing in (but admittedly, without reconstruction), we are not without our share of scandals - But this one takes the cake:

On the eve of Berlusconi's cost-cutting - belt-tightening squeeze, it was reported that the Region's officials - all 11 of them - gifted themselves spanking new 'auto blu'; the private cars sporting sirens that whisk politicians to and from their mistresses' apartments official visits around the area.  These cars, with a price tag of 22,000 euros ($30,000) per month come complete with plasma tvs so their escorts guests aren't bored while they officiate over another photo opp.  Enough money to rebuild at least something - how about the TV store for starters (as a sort of note of thanks), or, a bit of sidewalk in Aquila alone. 

To these politicians, and on behalf of all Italians everywhere, I'd like to dedicate a song which I believe best expresses the sentiments*

If you can't see video above, here is the link

Dirty White Boy lyrics

Hey, baby, if you're feelin' down   ‘cuz you ain’t got no home to go to
I know what's good for you all day   ‘cuz I’m your elected official
Are you worried what your friends see?   Don’t worry, they’ll get over it
Will it ruin your reputation lovin' me?   So you voted for me, so what?

'Cause I'm a dirty white boy
Yeah a dirty white boy
A dirty white boy

Don't drive no big black car   Are you kidding? I got me an auto-blu with driver!!!
Ain't like no Hollywood movie star   Hell, even Paris Hilton drives her own ride
You want me to be true to you   Just because you voted for me? Pffffhhhhhh
You don't give a damn what I do to you   Because you don’t protest loud enough or long enough - and no matter what you say, my car is staying!

I'm just a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, dirty white boy
Dirty white boy

Well, I'm a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, yeah, dirty white boy
A dirty white boy

I've been in trouble since I don't know when   Well, since the earthquake, actually
I'm in trouble now and I know somehow I'll find trouble again   If you count trouble as things that fall apart that I can cash in on
I'm a loner, but I'm never alone   No, my mistress is usually right by my side (after all, she’s my secretary)
Every night I get one step closer to the danger zone   If my wife finds out, it’s tee time with Tiger! (better hide those golf clubs…)

'Cause I'm a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, yeah, dirty white boy
Dirty white boy, I'm a dirty white boy
Dirty white boy

*song applicable also to Tony Hayward, CEO of BP Petroleum, Bernie Madoff, Ken Lay, all the Wall Streeters (with a special mention of derivatives traders & Goldman Sachs), Tanzi of Parmalat, and a list far too long to mention here.

A friend informs me that Italy has over 600,000 auto blu paid for by taxpayers.  A country as vast as France?  35,000.
And, for another Abruzzo town, the town of Teramo, whose entire Mayoral office swapped their auto blu for bicycles, I will dedicate another song, Sheryl Crow's version of Here comes the Sun for the Bee Movie.

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