Silvio Berlusconi's most recent claim that should he be forced to serve time (doing community service) for his financial crimes is tantamount to a "Coup". If you hadn't reached yet the outer bounds to this man's narcissism, well, this would be a good place to start. This statement speaks volumes about what the richest man in Italy thinks of his country: He runs it like a Zimbabwean Overlord. He also is threatening again to pull the plug whenever he sees fit - which, according to his weekend saber-rattling, is scheduled to align with the vote to oust him from parliament.
His buddy, Putin, is rumored to be en route to provide the elusive Get out of jail free card: A diplomatic passport to whisk him out of the country.
But in Silvio's defense, I must say,
he's a modern-day Robin Hood Despot Dictator. He didn't really rob from the rich to pay the poor; he didn't even use the government as his personal piggy-bank -- although both he and his companies certainly reaped benefits from many of the
ad personam laws that were passed to favor his oligarchy. But this happens in many countries; The USA no. 01 amongst them. Unlike Putin, Silvio is big-hearted: he never jailed his opposition, preferring to buy them off. He would use his media empire to publicly humiliate the nay-sayers, raking them through the coals. One could say, Silvio is like Santa; making a list and checking it twice.
Instead, Berlusconi deprived the poor taxpayers of Italy of their hard-earned funds, in order to deviate them to his lesser
paesani orbiting his inner circles: like childhood buddy and IBM Director, Stanca, getting millions to build a national brand website and later a choice job posting in charge of the
World Expo in Milan after being disgraced for having built the horrific $3.99
Italy.it site. But Silvio's hardly the only one to do this: Just last week, the new Prime Minister rewarded bonuses of $30,000 to his $270,000/year salaried managers (there are hundreds just on his staff alone) for increasing productivity [e.g., employing email and other means to streamline communications -- as if they weren't already spending their days on porn sites, facebook and twitter]. That bonus is more than the average salary of two-income families with unemployed offspring wasting away in Italy.
While the politicians pretend that the public money suddenly at their fingertips is for their own private distribution of these types of perks, salaries and backroom rewards, Silvio instead dipped into his own deep pockets to give money to those less fortunate. He doesn't do this the honorable way, say, like Bill Gates, or The Kresge Foundation or heck, the thousands who donate their money to universities, museums and foundations. Instead, Berlusconi simply put most of his call girls on his payroll, put other PYTs into choice government "jobs" that pay more than what Barack Obama makes, even as they push pencils in city government offices or in the European parliament. He even goes as far to house women in his apartments lest they be forced to return to the streets - and beat the pavement for new Johns who most certainly won't be as generous. He gave millions of his own funds to friends and agents who could ply him with hookers; some disgraced and in jail today.
So, where to next? Parliament will vote on whether this convicted criminal (and we haven't even finished the trial of his abetting prostitution and sex with an underaged hooker) should remain in politics.
(The official term, decadenza or forfeiture which, delightfully, just so happens to be the same word for decadence). Silvio, in his defense, states his family is being treated like the Jews under Hitler -- clearly in the dark as to the reason for his supposedly being shipped to a concentration camp (he's allowed free movement around Italy, to each of his villas & playgrounds) and ultimately gassed (being told to go home & stop playing politics with people's lives and livelihoods). He then reiterated his claim that any community service would be an insult to his dignity [Clearly neglecting to think of the irony of that statement for two reasons:
1) A dirty old pervert who is practically running a prostitution ring day & night from his high office is dignified? And 2) Serving the public was what he should have been doing in the first place.]
So, we're now at the 11th hour. He has thrown down his last card, demanding a Presidential Pardon for his multimillion euro
payoffs,
errr piccadilloes. I can't help but think where Italy might be today if he and his cronies had employed the same fervor in propping up Silvio so he can get it on in Arcore, and put it into saving Italy from slipping further into debt and impotence. The Ace up his sleeve? Taking all the flaccid politicians down with him - thus putting a (temporary) end to their orgies of massive paychecks & perks, chauffer-driven cars & backroom bribes. The ones that don't return get to ride out their dismay in lavish villas with huge retirement checks that will go to their wives and kids one day.
In the end, Silvio Berlusconi will always remain a role model and symbol of Italy: He's the poster boy for corruption, the narcissistic playboy who many wish they were, the monied
bon vivant who everyone wants to be around, the jokester who laughs while the rest of the country falls into oblivion, the pathological liar who blames it all on the Commies. Sadly, what Italy won't get from Silvio is an impressive university chair, a thinktank, a museum trust, or any investment in his supposed beloved country. Just like the worst of the Ancient Emperors, we'll be left with just a few rotting columns one day in the heart of Rome in his name.
And the final irony? For all his communist-bashing, his savior may just be the man who heads up Russia; a country that has all the natural resources, corruption and whores galore to whet the appetite of any Despot Dictator.
